Parody of “The Dolls”, words and music by
Eva Van Daele-Hunt
and
Crystal Blum (translator)
For
more information
and other parodies, see
www.songworm.com
Parody lyrics ©2023-11-05 by Bob Kanefsky. All rights reserved. The copyright of the original lyrics and music remain with the holder(s) of the original copyright.
The Mash-up of the Wreck of the Crash
I’ll tell you a story as sad as it’s true,
Of a wreck and a crash, a derailment and worse,
Some unlucky miners, an ill-fated crew:
Just a quirk of statistics or preordained curse.
There once was a mine in the town of East Hill.
Seventeen men at work when the warning ñlight flashed.
They quickly found out this was no fire drill.
But escape was cut off by a terrible crash.
Kentucky, a steam ship, was badly off course.
For the pond near the mine was too shallow by far.
With seams that her shipwright could not reinforce
She quickly became one big steel abattoir.
A train plowed ahead through the strange smoky weather,
Taking women and children and men on a trip.
An everyday crowd, ninety-four altogether,
On the tracks on this day, dead ahead, was a ship.
The train’s engineer was quite valiant and skillful.
Even so, they were all bound to die.
Its cars crushed a bus in a shower of glass,
The train broke a teacher and all of her class,
As a truck filled with puppies sped by!
High up in the sky was a plane full of babies.
That stalled and plunged down from the turbulent heights.
Its cargo, the cure for both cancer and rabies.
It crashed with such force that it formed crystallites.
******
And that was the story, as sad as it’s truthful,
Of the main urban centers, volcanically lit.
No carnage since then has been nearly so ruthful —
Til one day in Jersey, the asteroid hit.