Parody of “Let It Snow”, words by
Sammy Cahn
, music by
Jule Styne
For
more information
and other parodies, see
www.songworm.com
Parody lyrics ©2006-12-22 by Bob Kanefsky. All rights reserved. The copyright of the original lyrics and music remain with the holder(s) of the original copyright.
From the Great Above she opened her ear to the Great Below.
From the Great Above the goddess opened her ear to the Great Below.
From the Great Above Inanna opened her ear to the Great Below.
My Lady abandoned heaven and earth to descend to the underworld.
Inanna abandoned heaven and earth to descend to the underworld.
She abandoned her office of holy priestess to descend to the underworld.
She gathered together the seven me.
She took them into her hands.
With the me in her possession, she prepared herself.
She placed the the crown of the steppe on her head.
She tied the small lapis beads around her neck.
She let the double strand of beads fall to her breast.
She wrapped the royal robe around her body.
She pulled the breastplate which is called “Come, man, come” over her breast.
She decorated her eyes with the mascara called “Let him come, let him come,”
She daubed her forehead with the ointment called “Kiss my face.”
She bathed her dark locks in the fragrant shampoo
called “Gee, your hair smells terrific.”
She provisioned herself with the last loaves of bread from the late harvest.
She spread upon them the thickened oil of rapeseed
called “I cannot believe it is not butter.”
“OK, so I made the last three names up, but the first two were totally in all the translations.
Granted, maybe ancient Sumerian goddesses named their breastplates;
after all, medieval men named their swords.
(Then again, men name a lot of things.)
But no one names an individual bottle of mascara, or ointment, or whatever it translates to.
They name a particular type of mascara, to distinguish it from inferior types.
What we have here is product placement.
Where there’s product placement, there are advertising jingles.
Unfortunately, no ancient Sumerian advertising jingles have come down to us.
But fear not: I’ve reconstructed one...
When the underworld has been gated
And mascara’s indicated,
Then try lining your eyes with some
Let Him Come, Let Him Come, Let Him Come!
An invention we’re shipping later
Is the handy applicator.
But for now you just use your thumb.
Let Him Come, Let Him Come, Let Him Come!
In you waning years, how time flies!
You’re reluctant to deal with your fate.
But with eyeliner on your eyes,
On Ereshkigal’s hook you’ll look great!
When you lover with you is lying
And the guy will soon be dying,
Then delaying his pleasure’s dumb.
Let Him Come, Let Him Come, Let Him Come!