Parody of “Tinker's Daughter”, words and music by
Frank Hayes
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Parody lyrics ©2012-02-23 by Bob Kanefsky. All rights reserved. The copyright of the original lyrics and music remain with the holder(s) of the original copyright.
“Horsetamer’s Daughter” is a classic filk song that is almost never performed, because it’s considered too long — even by filkers who are planning to stay up all night until the hotel coffee shop opens for breakfast. (It’s almost 13 minutes, and that’s leaving out most of the choruses.) The conceit of this parody is that it and other filk songs are potential lovers.
When I was just a young fan and could still last through the night,
They warned me off, but I heard of her, and longed to do her right.
They say no man has done her; she hid herself away,
But I love the horse tamer’s daughter, and I’m in the mood to play.
| Chorus: |
And there’s many short and pretty, and there’s many fast and fun. But I love the horse tamer’s daughter when there’s only time for one. |
A horse tamer mounts them wild, and he drives them far and wide,
And the red-haired daughter of the horse tamer could give me quite a ride.
I’ve resisted things from siren’s song to mermaids on the beach,
Though I’ve done a thousand others, in about four minutes each.
(Chorus)
I’ve done the spaceport taverns and the space-born women there,
And I’ve done the wondrous gorgon underground with snakes in place of hair,
Done the dark and wicked hellions, and a rebel princess too,
But with them I start on a single part and find I’m almost through.
(Chorus)
Now, love will keep you guessing, and love will keep you young,
And love is a performance that you dare not do unstrung.
And love will make you anxious if you ever start to doubt,
But I love the horse tamer’s daughter, while my stamina holds out.
| Chorus: |
And there’s many short and pretty, and there’s many fast and fun. But I love the horse tamer’s daughter when there’s only time for one. |
And there’s many short and pretty, and there’s many fast and fun.
And I love the horse tamer’s daughter, but I hope she’s almost done.