Parody of “My Love Was Like the Moon”, words and music by
Blake Hodgetts
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Parody lyrics ©2009-03-22 by Bob Kanefsky. All rights reserved. The copyright of the original lyrics and music remain with the holder(s) of the original copyright.
Dedicated to Harry Mudd’s wife, Stella (for those who remember Star Trek Classic).
And my love was like the moon:
Every night her pockmarked face would loom nearby.
And the center of her mass,
Concentrated in her ass,
Warped the mattress near my thigh.
And my love was like the moon:
I got used to treading lightly or I’d find
That one man’s one small misstep,
By the way her logic leapt,
Was the fault of all mankind.
| Chorus: |
She was like the month of May: There’d be penalties to pay Even once she got her due. Like an asymptotic curve, Not quite working up the nerve To admit that we were through. |
And my love was like the sun:
With no warning whatsoever she’d lash out.
When we saw her temper flare,
We would all hide from her glare
Lest our safety be in doubt.
And my love was like the sun.
And some nights I would sneak out to stare at stars.
And would think, with some regret,
I might find one hotter yet,
If I hung around in bars.
| Chorus: |
Like a pitch too high to hear, Dogs would cringe when she was near. And start howling out their lungs. Like a harp that’s played too soon, If she’d only stop to tune, She would not be so high-strung. |
And my love was like the sea.
And she kept me far apart from all my friends.
She’d remain at home all day
And she’d pressure me to stay,
And I dared not risk the bends.
And my love was like the sea.
And her swells hid hazards I could not discern.
Needs too shallow to respect
All the men whose lives she wrecked.
And it soon would be my turn.
And my love was like a shrew...
And my love was, like, a shrew...