Parody of “Water, Fire, and Smoke”, words and music by
Betsy Rose
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Parody lyrics ©2000-08-01 by Bob Kanefsky. All rights reserved. The copyright of the original lyrics and music remain with the holder(s) of the original copyright.
It's been a long struggle. I started from scratch.
I used every method; I used every match.
I used lighter fluid, in hopes it would catch
Onto charcoal, fire, and smoke.
I've fussed and I've fiddled all day since I woke.
Feasted on fumes 'til I started to choke.
Now I set down the lighter and gingerly poke
At the charcoal, fire, and smoke.
| Chorus: |
So run from the oven, the pan and the crock. Run from the stovetop, the skillet and the wok. You will find a black altar, already stocked With some charcoal, fire, and smoke. |
Charcoal that's staining my hands dirty black.
Fire, if we're lucky. The wind's coming back.
Smoke when the fat drips from meat on the rack.
Onto charcoal, fire, and smoke.
Long before embers, that marshmallows take.
Long before spuds wrapped in foil can bake.
Long before hot dogs, hamburger, and steak,
There is charcoal, fire, and smoke.
| Chorus: |
So run from the oven, the pan and the crock. Run from the stovetop, the skillet and the wok. You will find a black altar, already stocked With some charcoal, fire, and smoke. |
I've laid down the patties, and one frozen ear.
With spatula ready, and tongs lying near.
What good will it do if they all disappear
All our charcoal, fire, and smoke?
I've choked on the ashes. I've waved off the flies.
Empty of burgers and full of french fries.
But see what my long preparation now buys
With the charcoal, fire, and smoke.
| Chorus: |
If you like it cooked your way, where you are the boss, If you like broiled sirloin, and freshly smoked lox, Then I hope you like eating at Jack in the Box. We've got charcoal, fire, and smoke. |