And Use The Force

Parody of “And All That Jazz”, words by Fred Ebb , music by John Kander

For more information and other parodies, see
Parody lyrics ©2024-02-16 by Bob Kanefsky. All rights reserved. The copyright of the original lyrics and music remain with the holder(s) of the original copyright.

Come on, kid, why don’t we head for town
And use the Force.
I’m gonna raise my hood and wave my hand around
And use the Force.
Float the car, I know a Wookiee’s chum
Unless they shoot him first before he draws his gun.
It’s just a place for booze, clandestine interviews, 
And using... force.

Spoken: Chasky nowy u chusu.
And use the Force.
Spoken: Ches koba tuta creesta crenko...
               ya kolska!
And use the Force.

* If the spoken words are too much, it can be shortened to the last word of each. The original song just had “skidoo” and “hotcha”, but I felt that more might be needed for anyone to recognize it as an alien (Hutt) language from the scene. Specifically, it’s from the bounty hunter Greedo’s last words, subtitled “I’m lucky I found you first” and “I’ve been waiting for this for a long time.”

Pack your droids and leave your uncle’s place.
And use the Force.
I’ve got your father’s weapon in my trophy case. 
I used the Force.
Hold on, kid, we’re gonna planet hop.
They bought exhaust port shielding at the discount shop.
And if you lose the farm or want a brand new arm
(Just use... the...

Oh, he’s getting old for the cantina scene.
So use the Force.
Oh, but he’s disarming with his bright blue beam.
He used the Force.
Show us where to park our speeder.
No! These droids aren’t stolen either. *
(Jedi mind tricks work on hicks.)
Just use... the... Force.

* “EEther”. I know there are two ways to pronounce “either” and generally they are both considered correct. But for purposes of this song, only the one that is a near rhyme is correct. Which is EETHER. Same in “Grill Fire”, for assonance. Unless I’m wrong about the hover-car is called; if it were called a “glider” then I would say that only the other pronunciation is correct.

Trash your blaster if you’re truly wise
And use the Force.
Do like I do and just close your eyes
And use the Force.
Trust me, kid, you’re gonna walk the sky.
I bet your dad’d take notice if he saw you fly
Among the asteroids and never get destroyed
And use... the... Force.

and strike me down
I know I’ll
stick around!
And use... the... Force.
The Force.